


Just Red

by sallyamongpoison



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: M/M, Nightmares, Red Templars, written for prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-24
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-15 22:04:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 729
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5801905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sallyamongpoison/pseuds/sallyamongpoison
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Cullen has a nightmare that he can't shake.</p>
<p>Written for the prompt- Énouement: The bittersweetness of having arrived in the future, seeing how things turn out, but not being able to tell your past self.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Red

It’s red. It’s all so red. It’s so red that Cullen’s worried he’s dying. He’s thrashing, struggling to turn his head and see why it’s all so red. It’s cold, too. So, so cold. So cold it burns his skin and makes his eyelids feel like they’re sticking. He hurts, aches like the lyrium is burning in him, and Cullen whimpers. It’s like he can’t breathe. His chest...something’s  _ in _ his chest. His heart is beating hard against something sharp that feels like ice and fire through his skin.

Is he dying? Has he been stabbed?

_ “And you swear your loyalty to only me?” _

The voice is deep and murky, like swimming in a pond with too much silt, and it wavers through Cullen’s ears and all the way down to his soul. That’s not a good voice. Cullen can feel it deep inside himself, a sickness, and he wants to scream and get away. The longer he listens to it the more he  _ wants _ it. He wants...he wants to serve. Maker, he wants whatever that voice is promising him.

_ “You will be my General. My hands. You’ll do as I tell you and lead your men to a new Age under me.” _

Yes. Yes he will. He’ll take his men and do whatever that voice wants him to do. He’ll _change_ them. He’ll make them in the Elder One’s image. He’ll give them his power. He’ll do it. Oh, he’ll do it because there’s a New Order coming. Cullen can feel it, even if it makes him feel sick. It makes him feel wrong and ill, but Maker help him...the Maker… the Maker isn’t listening. _He_ is listening. _He_ ’s there. 

_ “This is all you’ll need. Take it. Go to your Templars and change them. Give them purpose again.” _

Purpose. Their purpose has been corrupted. They’re sick. They’re sick and need to be changed. They’ve shunned him. They’ve cast him out and left him to die and he’s going to make them  _ better _ . Yes. Yes that’s what he’s going to do. No more burning out their minds and leaving them to die when they’re not useful anymore.

There’s something in his hand. It’s sharp and hot, but it feels so good. Cullen can hear it...it’s  _ singing _ and the song is beautiful. It’s going to change the world. It’s going to change  _ everything _ .

\--

He bolted upright, chest heaving, and coughed like he’d spent hours with his head in a smokey fire. Cullen felt...Maker, he felt like his head was spinning. It hurt. Everything hurt. He could still see the red behind his eyes. He could hear the singing, but it was fading. It was him, but it wasn’t. He could see it all, but not. He was...falling. No. Sitting. 

“You alright?”

That gruff voice shook him out of the last holds of his dream. Raleigh. Raleigh was there and he’d had another nightmare. One of cullen’s hands reached out to rest on the man’s shoulder and Cullen sucked in a wet breath. His face was wet too. He’d been crying.

Crying?

“I...you can’t,” he breathed, and turned to look at where Raleigh was looking at him through the blue shadows. Cullen suddenly knew he needed to tell him everything, about what he’d seen, but it was fading now. Going…

Gone.

“Can’t what?” Raleigh asked as he leaned up on his elbow and kissed at Cullen’s shoulder.

He sucked in another breath and wiped at his face. “I don’t know,” Cullen answered, then sniffed a bit. Something in his stomach felt knotted, and every time he looked into that handsome face it got worse. Raleigh. Raleigh who was always there with a hand on his back to help calm him down when a wave of anger would come out of nowhere or a nightmare took him. He’d pushed his cot closer to Cullen’s so they could sleep with Cullen’s head buried in against his ribs. No one had let him do that since his mother when he’d been young.

“S’alright, Rutherford,” he soothed, “you remember anything else about it?”

Cullen shook his head, paused, and frowned. He couldn’t remember it, but it had been so important. So wrong. So...so…

“Red.” Cullen whispered, then shook his head so his sweat-damp curls that were cropped close to his head swayed a little.

“Red?”

“Just...red.”

**Author's Note:**

> Come find me on tumblr! @sallyamongpoison


End file.
